Zambian Mission, Chipata, Zambia, Africa, Missionary John Holtz

Q’d up & T’d off

Can't get the end nor the beginning of the fuel queue in the picture!

The lines were long and the tempers short.

Harsh words.
Glaring looks.
Verbal assaults.
Competitive spirit.

Drivers jockeyed for position. Fights broke out. Strong wills clashed. Police reinforcements called up.

The problem? A month long country wide fuel shortage.

It brought out more than our empty jerry cans to be filled. It brought out our sinful nature to be killed! One could easily sense the tension and the desperation. People cried foul. Attendants were criticized. People assailed. Accusations and insinuations abounded:

“Hurry up!”
            “She cut in front of me!”
                        “You can’t get that much fuel!”
                                    “I got here first!
                                                “You’re stupid!”

You’re stupid?

I could understand all the other comments, but "your stupid?" That’s what one person shouted at me when I asked him why he was cutting the queue (line). I had been in queue for almost four hours and still couldn’t see the pump! He pulled up ahead of me, nosed in and shut off his vehicle. I approached his window and asked him what he was intending to do. He said angrily, Who are you? I responded, “Who are YOU?” emphasizing the word, YOU. That’s when he retorted emphatically, “You’re stupid!”

That surprised me. Actually, shocked me. The word “stupid” coming from a Malawian mouth? This particular “S” word is taboo in this country. You just don’t say the “S” word in Malawi. It’s disrespectful if not just plain discourteous.

Even though it was 95' F degrees in the shade, I could feel my own temperature rising. Like a hundred other folk, I, too, was Q’d up and T’d off. Like a lighted firecracker, my fuse was growing shorter. I had plenty of words in the arsenal of my mind with which to blast him but I chose to holster my mental gun and walk away in silent frustration. But - believe you me - I smirked when an attendant, a few minutes later, ushered him to the end of the ever growing queue.

Hee, hee, hee...he got what he deserved.

But the longer I waited, the worse I felt. Even though I didn’t say any nasty words to the one who called me stupid, I thought them. Any number of hurtful verbal bullets I could have shot back!

Then I felt a conviction. The Holy Spirit was probing my heart and my mind with the Word I had learned long ago: because of God’s mercy, I am not going to get what I deserve! The Spirit led me to remember the life of Christ and the life I have in Christ. My life, even in queue, Jesus has made different. It’s unique. Peculiar. Sanctified and set apart. The Holy Spirit led me to acknowledge...

I should have showed the Lord’s kind of kindness.
I should have displayed God’s agape love.
I should have exhibited Christ-like understanding.
I should have been a better witness to my fai...

Oh, yeah, my faith. Was I really displaying the faith I have? Was I really being a faithfull ambassador for Christ?

In a word, no. Plenty of “I should have’s” were actually “I didn’ts.”

Jesus didn't retaliate Waiting in the truck, I remembered my Lord. Jesus didn’t retaliate went things heated up for him. Jesus didn’t return insult for insult. Jesus didn’t get back or get even. He didn’t grumble or cry “unfair!” He said no nasty words and amazingly he even kept his thoughts pure! Totally pure!

The seemingly torturous hours I waited in line were nothing to the hours of torture that Jesus endured for me - all the way to the cross! Even though he was queued up for Golgotha He wasn’t ticked off at those who assaulted him. On the contrary, he loved them and forgave them.

For my angry tone and indecent thoughts I had in response to being called stupid, the Spirit nudged me to apologize to the man. I did.

Then in return, he did, too! He smiled a big Malawian smile. We shook hands. He then took his place in queue and I in mine.

My heart smiled. Another “S” word came to mind:

Savior.

The fuel problem is over. At least for now. Chances are good here in Malawi that there will be another shortage. But thanks be to God that there is no shortage of His love and forgiveness. And look! He keeps on giving opportunities to witness our faith as we wait in line, whether in a bank, at an ATM, in a restaurant or grocery store. Even getting diesel! Savior is a good “S” word to remember when we find ourselves once again...

Q’d up and T’d off.

John Holtz, Mission Partner

John Holtz